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Jim Palmer’s got nothing on David Beckham.

Palmer, the Hall of Fame pitcher for the Baltimore Orioles, jumped into Jockeys as his career was winding down in the 1980s, a campaign gay men of a certain age might recall.

But the ads, provocative for their time, hold nothing on soccer stud David Beckham’s newest campaign for Armani that debuted last week in San Francisco. Think six-story shirtless and pants-less Beckham in his underwear with a bulge that seemed to cast a shadow over onlookers  on the street below.

The briefs created a buzz last week, to be sure. Even self-admitted heterosexual reporters were taken in by all that is Becks. Peter Hartlaub, a pop culture critic for the San Francisco Chronicle, wrote an amusing 1,000-word column about his experience at the unveiling, which included an interview as brief as Becks’ new underwear. (How the pop culture critic for the Chron isn’t gay is another post entirely.)

Beckham arrives Posh-less, and is quickly ushered into a white tent with the approximate dimensions and party vibe of Brad Pitt’s quarters when he played Achilles in the movie “Troy” - easily the most metrosexual movie of the 21st century. The tent is packed like Muni during rush hour, so I don’t see the man until he’s right in front of me.

Beckham is, for lack of a better word, man-tastic. He leans on a stool, wearing a crisp white shirt and silver tie, having just taken off his cream suit jacket. His hair is cut short and simple, ceding attention to his long stubble, which covers his face except for two Band-Aid-size vertical stripes shaved clean on either side of his goatee. (Note to self: Try that one at home. See if wife goes crazy with passion.)

A squealing teen summed up the experience for Hartlaub: “He’s hot. Really, really hot.” Yeah, we know.

The boys of the Hotlanta Soccer Association are looking to recruit. Fresh off their successful Hotlanta Soccer Classic, a Memorial Day tournament that included seven teams, they want more.

So to spread the word about Hotlanta Soccer, they are hosting in information session before their regular practice tomorrow at 10 a.m. You’ll find them at the practice field at Grady High School in Midtown.

During the summer months, HSA will field teams in the Atlanta Silverbacks Park League, which features 7v7 competition. In fact, they’ve got three teams in the current season, which runs until early August. 

Cristiano Ronaldo sits. Portugal loses. And he keeps his jersey on.

What a disappointing Sunday as Portugal fell to Switzerland 2-0 in the team’s final Group A match at Euro 2008.

But you can’t blame the soccer stud, whose jersey-less postgame celebrations make soccer fans swoon across the globe. He sat on Sunday and rested as Portugal offered up a squad of mostly reserves in the meaningless match. Portugal plays again on Thursday in the quarterfinals.

Star winger Cristiano Ronaldo downplayed the match’s importance and said his absence was not a factor.

“We could have lost even if I played,” Ronaldo said. “We knew this game was meaningless, so we have to move our focus to the quarterfinals.”

But as Ronaldo (above with Ricardo Quaresma) sat and Euro 2008 progresses, speculation increases about the future of the muscled soccer wonder and what will happen when the tourney’s all over. Will he quit Manchester United for Real Madrid in a deal that could make him the best-paid player in the world? Ronaldo, for now, isn’t saying as he attempts to keep his team focused on the Euro 2008 title.

In the meantime, enjoy Ronaldo’s photos in the Euro 2008 photo gallery.

Photos: Getty Images

Cristiano Ronaldo can’t keep his jersey on. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

The soccer stud helped lead Portugal over the Czech Republic on Wednesday, scoring his first goal in eight months and moving on to the quarterfinals of the European Championship. Portugal plays Switzerland on Sunday. 

“If we’re carrying on playing like this as a unit, we’ve got great chances,” star winger Cristiano Ronaldo said.

Ronaldo’s first goal for Portugal since October was the winner. It came in the 63rd minute off a brilliant pass by playmaker Deco, who scored Portugal’s first goal. Substitute Ricardo Quaresma clinched it in injury time off a pass from Ronaldo.

It wasn’t long after the final whistle on Wednesday when the 23-year-old Ronaldo stripped off his jersey for post-game celebrations. Photographers seemed to capture every sweaty flex and ripple for the Euro 2008’s Portugal photo gallery.

Besides wowing his gay fans, Ronaldo’s play is also winning over critics. And for a breakdown of Portugal’s 3-1 win, check out this Deadspin analysis. Let’s hope his winning – and shirtless –  ways continue on Sunday.

Atlanta’s soccer scene may soon be sporting top-flight professional teams for men and women.

The area, already home to the Atlanta Silverbacks of the United Soccer Leagues – essentially what Major League Baseball would call its minor leagues – is frequently mentioned as the site of expansion efforts for Women’s Professional Soccer and its brothers in Major League Soccer, the premier pro league in the U.S.

A recent report pegged Atlanta as one of four cities under consideration for WPU, a seven-city league that doesn’t start play until 2009. Atlanta’s in the mix for a 2010 expansion team, which costs about $1.5 million. WPS is the successor to the Women’s United Soccer Association that ran from 2001 to 2003 and included the Atlanta Beat.

The price of admission to MLS is about $40 million, a price tag seen affordable by Arthur Blank, the Home Depot co-founder who owns the Atlanta Falcons and the Gwinnett Gladiators. Blank’s made public his desire to own a soccer team and was mentioned in recent reports as one of a handfulof potential new owners. MLS wants to add its 17th and 18th teams by 2011.

The Silverbacks, by the way, have opened their 2008 campaigns. The women’s team leads the Atlantic Division of the Eastern Conference with a 6-0 record. They play at home on June 7. The men, with a 3-3 record, sit in seventh place in the First Division. They take the field again on Friday.

A potion of my Memorial Day Weekend included stops at the three gay sporting events taking place in Atlanta. Well four, really, if you count the home opener of the Atlanta Dream season. As well stocked with lesbians as Philips Arena was for the game, it’s safe to call that WNBA game a gay event.

Back to the others last weekend – Hotlanta Soccer Classic, Hotlanta Softball Challenge and the annual convention of the International Gay Bowling Organization. In addition to the photos from the events you can see here and here, I also talked with participants for my Southern Voice sports column this week. Read the full story.

Gay soccer players from around the country converged on Atlanta over the weekend for the Hotlanta Soccer Classic, an annual tournament hosted by the Hotlanta Soccer Association.

Seven teams, including some gay-friendly ones from metro Atlanta, played over two days during the holiday weekend at the Georgia Soccer Park in East Point. The tournament was booted from its previous home at Piedmont Park earlier this year when the city of Atlanta put in place new drought restrictions. P’cheen, a team from Atlanta, defeated the San Diego Sparks to win the event.

“Atlanta is always very good about coming to our [indoor tournament] and we always come down here to see them,” says Ken Sanchez, a member of the New York Ramblers. “Atlanta has been a very gracious host and these guys do an amazing job.”

The Hotlanta Soccer Classic was one of three gay sports events held in Atlanta over Memorial Day Weekend. The others include the Hotlanta Softball Challenge and the International Gay Bowling Organization’s annual convention.

If you’re still in Atlanta this weekend (many gay folks head south to Pensacola) and not fully occupied with the Atlanta Dream (they play tonight and Sunday afternoon), there are some sporty gay options for your Memorial Day holiday.

Nearly 700 gay and lesbian bowlers are here for the International Gay Bowling Organization Annual 2008, the conference and tournament by the body that sanctions gay bowling. They will take over two bowling centers – in Midtown and Norcross – for the event.

Organizers of the annual Dixie Invitational Bowling Tournament in Atlanta put together the bid for the event, which returns to the city after a 15-year absence. The event also includes a display on Sunday of the 23 IGBO panels created for the AIDS Memorial Quilt.

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Being sporty this weekend has never been so easy. There’s cycling, a pageant and a couple of opportunities to get your drink on.

At 7:30 a.m. on Saturday, some 100 cyclists are expected to push off from their starting line at Emory University to begin a 200-mile bike ride. The 6th Annual Action Cycling 200 is expected to raise more than $75,000 for the Emory Vaccine Center, which develops vaccines for AIDS and other infectious diseases.

At noon, there’s the “Ruggers & Buggers & Buns” cookout and fund-raiser for the Atlanta Bucks Rugby Football Club. The event serves as an early send-off for the rugby team, which travels to Ireland in June to compete in the International Gay Rugby Association & Board championships. A $10 ticket – $15 at the door – means all the burgers, hot dogs, brats, sides and dessert you can eat.

Later in the day, the Hotlanta Softball League hosts its annual pageant for the Open Division. The Mr. & Ms. HSL Pageant raises about $3,000 for the league, which splits it among teams taking part in the Gay Softball World Series in August. Admission is $10. Show time is 6 p.m.

“It’s some of the ugliest drag and some of the studliest men in Atlanta,” says Art Davenport, HSL’s secretary. “It is a real evening of contrasts.”

On Sunday, the Hotlanta Soccer Association is hosting a wine raffle to raise funds for its tournament over the Memorial Day holiday. Tickets to the raffle, which includes more than $2,500 in wine, are $5. The raffle takes place during “Margaritas, Mojitos & Mischief,” an event that costs $15 and includes unlimited margaritas and mojitos. The event begins at 4 p.m.

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If you’re not heading to the beach for Memorial Day Weekend, there’s plenty of sporty stuff left to do in Atlanta during the holiday.

There’s the Hotlanta Softball Challenge, the Hotlanta Soccer Classic and the International Gay Bowling Organization Annual 2008. More than 1,000 gay and lesbian athletes will be in town for the events, which will provide no shortage of competition and better yet, eye candy.

For a more detailed look at the events, check out my current Southern Voice sports column. Read the full story.